Hayley Garnett on Seeing Beauty That Goes Deeper Than Aesthetics

Hayley Garnett is a mental health advocate and mom of three using Instagram to normalize and celebrate postpartum bodies and stories. We asked her about her story, and how she came to see beauty in everything.

Here’s what Hayley had to say:

As someone who's experienced many highs and lows in regards to self esteem and feelings of self worth, I've really only recently come to allow myself to redefine what beauty means to me personally. For so long the word "beauty" held nothing but a social definition that was reiterated over and over through the media/entertainment industry. Back then I never even thought to take a step back from this frame of mind. I merely accepted the lies that I was fed about what made something beautiful.

In high school it felt essential to wear makeup and do my hair. In my early adulthood it felt essential to be thin. In parenthood it felt essential to be put together always. All of these struggles had their own outcomes that have changed my life forever. Once I learned to do my make up and hair in a way I felt would be described as beautiful--it didn't solve anything. I still compared myself to all of my peers. Once i started a diet and watched the pounds melt away I would find myself plateauing which in turn caused me to start restricting my calories and overexercising. The final straw for me was collapsing underneath the pressure of being a mother that was *always* put together— I realized that things needed to change.

“I was allowing myself to believe that beauty was merely an aesthetic trait that could be seen, when in reality it encompasses so much more.”

— hayley garnett

I was allowing myself to believe that beauty was merely an aesthetic trait that could be seen, when in reality it encompasses so much more.

I decided to let it all out through social media. I decided that I didn't have to subscribe to anyone else’s definition of beauty. And do you know what? I've found beauty everywhere and in everything. I don't just see beauty in a "pretty face", a smile, a bright color or a charming home. I see beauty in the struggle. I see beauty in defeat. I see beauty in failure.

All I needed to do was learn patience. For so long I made the determination that something was beautiful based on the direct and immediate reaction of my senses (sight, sound, feeling, etc). What I've found is that beauty is deep, not shallow. Beauty does not solely encourage happiness/contentment.

Beauty is along for the ride and often shows up when you least expect it.